Bad Astrologer
I've been studying astrology for over a decade and I've stopped being nice about it. No sugar-coating. No gentle let-downs. Just the horrible, weirdly accurate truth.
Daily horoscopes
Your daily dose of unsolicited honesty. Updated every morning, regretted by lunchtime.
Personalised readings £3.99/mo
Your natal chart read properly, plus daily, weekly, monthly, and annual forecasts based on your actual placements — not just your sun sign. Plus the complete guide to every sign in the zodiac.
Horoscopes by email
Your horoscope delivered straight to your inbox. Daily, weekly, or monthly — pick your poison. Free and unsubscribable.
Monthly horoscopes
A whole month of things you don't want to hear. I've done the charts. I'm sorry in advance.
Annual horoscopes
I've done the charts for the whole year. Every quarter, every disaster, every chance you won't take. You're welcome.
The signs
Every sign profiled at their absolute worst. The dark side, the red flags, and a survival guide.
Free birth chart
Enter a date, time, and place of birth and I'll calculate the full chart — every planet, in every sign, in every house. No account required.
The incompatibility test
Pick your sign and your partner's. I'll tell you exactly why it won't work.
The podcast
All twelve signs read aloud every month by someone who has stopped being nice about it. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
The book Coming soon
The Bad Astrologer's guide to astrology — everything you need to know, explained by someone who can't believe you don't already know it.
Go deeper for £3.99 a month
The free readings are for everyone. Subscribe and I'll read your actual chart.
- ✦ Your full natal chart — every planet, every house
- ✦ Daily, weekly, monthly & annual readings built around your placements
- ✦ The complete guide to all 12 signs — in love, at work, as an ex
- ✦ Cancel any time. No drama. I'll just assume it's your Mercury placement.